Let me tell you something. And if you’re a parent reading this, then right off the bat, I’ll apologize for stating the obvious. But for those of my readership who do not have kids. I have to express one immutable axiom. Something so true I’ve never heard anyone disagree with it. A simple singular truth exists in the forefront of every person with kids’ minds. Being a parent is tough. I mean tough. I mean, it’s that sometimes there’s nothing else you want to do but turn off your alarm and roll over to get some more sleep, kind of tricky. The kind of toughness that you don’t just let go of. It requires constant attention and consistency to be a parent.
Even just getting your kids up to get ready to go to school can be a battle. And you have to fight it because even though your little Jeanette is the sweetest, most special girl in the world, she still needs to be at school at 7:30 with her teeth brushed and a fresh set of clothes on. Now, as any of the parents out there know already. This constant whirr of worrying seems to reach its peak right around the back-to-school season.
Who knows, maybe we will get complacent in the summer? Maybe we fall out of practice with our routines? I know that it gets harder and harder every year to anticipate this dreaded season. The thing I struggle with the most is keeping my budget straight. I’ll sit down, do the math and find an exact figure I want to spend for my daughter’s back-to-school shopping. But the second she wants something bad enough, she gives me “that” look. I melt like butter. All that financial planning goes out the door, and I cave immediately!
That’s why for this back-to-school season, I’m trying something new. I’m going to stick to my budget. I’m utilizing some new techniques to say no with, and above all, I’m staying strong. Because this is the year, I stick to my back-to-school budget!
The Art of the Soft No
So as I’m sure you can infer from my introduction, I have a problem saying no. When I was a kid, my parents didn’t pay for anything. It wasn’t that they didn’t want to; it’s just that they had more than me to take care of, and money was tight growing up. Now, as an adult. I only have one kid, and frankly, I’m doing alright. So when my child asks me for something and if I can give it to them. Naturally, I’d want to do so. I remember how disheartened and disappointed I would get seeing all of my friends and classmates with new toys and cool clothes. The last thing I would want is for my daughter to feel that. But This is where I have to remind myself. That this is not the case. She has plenty of clothes. We bought her a pair of leggings just last week. She’s doing ok. So with this in mind, I concocted a new strategy. I call it the “soft no”. It’s an ingenious little trick that allows me to say no softly without dealing with all those tears. When my daughter asks for something, it’s a luxury item she doesn’t need. I simply say, “maybe.” Or, “let me think about it.” Now, this is a deflective tactic, and there will come a time when you’ll have to say no firmly. But what I find so compelling about the soft no is that it lets you work your way up to that firm rejection. Now you have the space to gain the courage to say no with conviction rather than having to make an off-the-cuff decision!
Sticking To Your Budget
Not every argument will be placated with a simple pair of shine leggings. This next piece of advice should be given to only older children. Do you find that when you talk to your kids about your finances, they always have a ton of wants? But no firm grasp on the details of what being financially solvent entails? Well, maybe it’s time for a little lesson in the family finances! Starting your kids off early in financial literacy is a great way to make sure your kids understand what they are asking for when they ask for a new phone or a video game. You’re setting yourself up for success by giving them an early peak into what it takes to run home!
Setting a budget isn’t easy. Especially when it has anything to do with your kids. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve seen that number in my head just vanish. The moment my daughter asks me for something. It’s a test for any parent, and it’s not easy to learn. But if you create a budget, use the techniques we just discussed. I’m sure you’ll make it through!
